easter-angel2HAPPY

EASTER

 OR WEEKEND OFF, WHICH EVER.

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Sleeping In

where_angels_rest_by_obsidian_siren1It looks like I’ll still be sleeping in for the time being.  Things are becoming ridiculous, an ad for a cafe assistant in the Bowling Alley, must have tertiary qual. What the???

I’ve decided not to beat myself up re being out of work, try and get some things done around the house. Today I dug post holes, by hand. How elegant I looked in trackie pants, bit of a change from a business suit. I ran out of oomph after 2 holes, so cut firewood instead.

Meanwhile the quit smoking pill is beginning to work, the urge to smoke is not as strong, and I have cut down by 50%. The sugar craving has kicked in though. I had Bullets for dinner tonight, topped off with a Chocolate Chip HCB. If I keep this up, those business suits won’t fit!

We’ve had beautiful weather the last few days, and it’s a pleasure to be outdoors instead of being in an office. On the other hand, I checked my bank balance today and wished I was in that office. You can only pay bills for so long, without any income. The other half is working, his first pay is due next week. Thank goodness we were able to avoid Centrelink. Looking forward to ATO bonus.

WordPress Exercise

___angel______by_liekMy WordPress debut, an interesting exercise. Blogger has turned my blog into 2, both with the same address. Although the forum tells me that is absolutely impossible, and to look at both URL’s, and they will be different. I did, and they are not.

I’m wondering if I import my blog, it will bring the one I want, or the one I don’t want, maybe both, who knows? Worse still, they will  disappear, and 2 years of my blogging will be totally lost.

I think some research is needed before I commit, don’t you?

Escape

I have finally escaped, but how come I don’t feel any different?

It took a couple of weeks to get her face out of my head every time I shut my eyes. Now, her face only appears now and then.

I can’t sleep, so tried Valarian a couple of times. I had nightmares, spiders and tigers, so decided to give it a miss. I hate spiders.

I am gardening frantically, trying to get so tired that I will sleep. It’s not happening, and I dread going to bed. I used to meditate to get to sleep, but can’t manage to do that any more. Some refresher meditation classes might be in order, I think.

Not working is having a very bad effect on the bank balance, not sure what will happen with the house. Can’t keep paying a mortgage with no income. So………..we’ll wait for a few more weeks and see what happens.

On a more positive note, I have started on the ‘quit smoking pill. I’m only on day 2, and have not noticed any side effects, and so far it has not stopped my cravings. I had to set a day to stop smoking, which I have done. Saturday 18th April. Hmmm!!!

I guess it’s not so bad, as B said, we’re still alive, have running water and electricity. Until we are unable to pay the bills, that is. 🙂

Still Trapped – A Lesson Learned

I haven’t escaped yet, but it’s getting closer. The boss sends me messages through G. Ask her to return the uniform please. What does she think I would do with it? Wear the bloody thing for fun? Yeah, right.

Actually, I send her messages through G too. Can you tell me when to expect my termination pay? I didn’t get an answer.

I can feel myself retreating from the rest of the world. All I want to do is be by myself, the phone keeps ringing, I don’t answer it. If someone knocks on the door, I ignore it.

One day……..down the track, I’ll tell you about this particular job, what I did, how people are ripped off. BUT only after I get paid out, including the 7 months worth of Super that hasn’t been paid into my nominated fund.

Look at your next job offer, research the company and directors before you make the worst mistake of your lives, like G and I did. If it sounds too good to be true, it usually is. We may just go into bankruptcy because of these smooth talkers.

Denim

It looks like life is back to sleeping in. I have had two interviews, and one no thank you. One more interview on Thursday afternoon.

So…….back to sleeping in, and wearing jeans. I still have not quite escaped this hell hole, but only have 4 days to go. This is pay week though, so getting paid on time or even at all, remains to be seen.

It will be great to finally go home to stay, I have really missed it, and the DOG. Fancy having him two houses away, and having visitation rights only. However, we did agree that if we were to return, they would keep the dog. Fair is fair. I have to say, I don’t miss the hair. Long haired Saints are continually shedding. I swear you could spin the hair and knit a jumper out of it.

I have finally got somewhere with the Dept of Immigration, and am allowed to sit my citizenship test on the 26th May. About time too! I had a very understanding person on the other end of the phone, who showed a lot of common sense. No around and around the “what is your passposrt number”, I don’t have one, “what is your permanent residency number”, I don’t have one, etc. No arguments this time.:)

Anyway, back to sleeping in………

Yellow Heart – Black Heart

I’ve changed colour this time, yellow instead of black, but nothing has changed.

Well, maybe some things have changed. On reflection, a lot has changed.

This pretense we call life, struggling to keep an image, working to live or living to work, which ever one it is.

Longer hours, with nothing to show except extra stress. Everyone afraid if they don’t put in extra time, a replacement will be found. The replacement will, of course endeavour to live up to your image and in turn be caught in the trap.

I got over it. The big money, the entrenched lies that go with the job, the pretend ‘everything is perfect’ world. Oh, forgot the blame game, the happy, joyous corporate world , where everything that goes wrong in the higher echelons is always someone else’s fault.

Have you ever noticed your employer will NEVER take the blame, even though he/she made the mistake? I only had one boss that ever did that, and he was a car dealer. Just goes to show that car salesmen have more integrity than you imagined.

Annonymous

Interesting day. Hmmm…….. Annonymous. No faces, no names.

Today I voiced my opinion regarding the non payment of wages, and my negative outlook at the present time because of this. It ended up a total fiasco.

My husband resigned. The boss went nuts.

A little later……….I was asked to resign, I refused. She basically said she would make life very difficult, and that I couldn’t do my job properly. Which I can, by the way. My performance targets are way up, on one side, the other side is unmarketable in it’s present form, as has been documented in numerous meetings, by her. But, like all good bosses, she changed her mind and blamed it on me.

The thing is, unless they actually produce the product, and the purchaser pays in full, I don’t get commission. People get sick of waiting, pull out, and I lose out. I reckon around $14,000 this financial year.

Black Heart – Black Wings

Well, it’s come around again. Payday. No wages in the bank again. Not even an email this time.

I rang H/O and asked, the person I spoke to was in the same boat as me. Exec’s were not available to talk to. Remember, I changed my direct debit days? Maybe I should make it the week after??

In the meantime I had my interview, I blew it completely because I was over stressed re no wages. I could have kicked myself for giving incorrect answers to questions I actually know backwards.

The icing on the cake: An email right at knock off time!! Guess what?? Due to a technical hitch were were unable to process the payroll on Monday night, Tuesday night and also tonight. We may possibly have it sorted out tomorrow.

Crashed, Trapped & Burned

Have you ever got to that place in your life, when you feel you have crashed and burned? I don’t mean literally.

That place where you feel you can go no further, you are stuck. Everything seems to be at a standstill. Stuck in a job you don’t like, in a place that you hate more and more each day.

You feel you will be at this place forever, no moving on. You’ve given up on being well off, with a reasonable house and NO mortgage. I forgot to ad the credit card, definitely NO creditcard. Well, no credit card debt, anyway.

The car, another thing I’d love to ditch. Payments, that is.

I have a job interview next week, I guess in the end it will become the same. A means to an end. It just feels as if it will never end.

I’m not sure if I have ever loved my job. I can’t remember when I last jumped out of bed, and couldn’t wait to get to work. I don’t think it has ever happened.

The icing on the cake: Not being paid on time. Three times in a row. Can you believe they told us to move our direct debits forward 2 days, because they couldn’t guarantee we’d be paid on time? I believe the words were “We’ll go broke together” Can you believe that shit?

I rebelled and got to work very, very late. When asked my reason, I said if she couldn’t pay me on time, I couldn’t get to work on time.

On another topic, Victoria still has 15 fires buning. Different areas being threatened, more stress on families. Now they are talking about only re- building the homes that were insured, how un fair is that? Over two thousand homes lost, and two and a half thousand sheds, multiple businesses.

I guess that’s my bit said for the end of the month.

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